Regina Brett's Life Lessons Column Gets Given The Viral Treatment
And She Is Not 90 Years Old.
When did 45 Life Lessons become 25 Awesome Tips For A Beautiful Life?
If you keep reading, you will find out.
Regina Brett's "Life Lessons" column keeps getting put into chain letters.
A 2009 7% hoax
used it, lied about Ms. Brett's age. She won't be 90 until 2046,) and changed or chopped off some items, and put others out of place.
See Ms. Brett's rocking debunk of the 90-year-old thing.
A 2008 meme recirculated again as a 2013 sharing scheme on a Facebook page, under the title "25 Awesome Tips For A Beautiful Life". It heavily ripped off and did not give credit to Regina Brett for her original column.
These memes had the list all jumbled up, with a couple of entries being smushed together to look like one item, while another entry had lopped off the last bit of the item.
to read the original column, complete with items not included here because meme2009 had reproduced them exactly and they aren't in the other mutations, click here.
The 2008 and 2013 memes also contain other items that are not from Ms. Brett, but from that notorious author, anonymous. Since they don't even make it clear what is from Ms. Brett and what is not, heck, don't even credit her for her own, how's anyone going to know?
Mondo smash coming up. I'll do the usual and try to indicate which is Ms. Brett and which is from which meme. They don't start right away with the items from Ms. Brett's list, those come later but do not end the chain letters. The inconsistencies of the memes with Ms. Brett's article and with one another will be shown in the usual way. I won't say much of anything to the items by Ms. Brett, other than showing where the memes jumble and foul up, with the order and wordings. But it's a different story concerning that famous writer Anonymous…
* * *
meme2013: 25 AWESOME TIPS FOR A BEAUTIFUL LIFE!!!
Ocean Elf: *Grimace* Here goes another "You might not be living life right, so I'll tell you how to improve it, and you do me a good turn and pass it on!"
But this is going well beyond 25 since we're mangling a few meme mutations here.
memes2008&2013: 1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.
Ocean Elf: Depends on the time of year for me. I only like taking walks for the heck of it in warm weather, and there are people who can't go for walks, ever thought of that?
And this smile thing is just dopey! Look, I'm not going to put on a fake smile the moment I step out for a walk especially on your suggestion. Nobody tells me to smile. I smile when I dang well feel like it, and without even being aware of it, and that's how it's gonna be. Got that? Putting on a fake smile during a 10/30 min walk is not going to work as an antidepressant. What makes you think I'd even need an anti-depressant anyway? Huh? Well?
You know what cheers me up a lot more than walking and putting on an artificial smile like a dork?
Practicing music. Working. Giving my all at work and having it turn out especially good. Holding/playing with pets. Eating something really yummy. Going out shopping/for coffee/dinner. Watching favourite TV shows or videos. Sitting outside with my laptop during the summer. Heck, doing anything outdoors during the summer when it's no-jacket weather. Going to fairs/carnivals. Listening to marching bands. Watching fireworks. Sitting by a lake watching the sunset. Getting up and being awake enough to get ready to be outside just as the sun is coming up, and the morning is unusually warm. Taming squirrels and getting them to come right on me to get their food. Holding a sleeping infant, or holding and feeding her/him. Making people laugh. Birthday parties. Christmas. Any family get-together. Getting together with friends. Getting some good news, particularly the kind that relieves or excites. Listening to my favourite tunes on my iPod.
Any of those things sound a bit more uplifting than walking around for a set amount of time with a plastic smile on your face?
memes2008&2013: 2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
meme2008: Buy a lock if you have to.
Ocean Elf: And what if I don't have the time or just don't want to? My life will still be well worth living, believe me.
meme2008: 3. Buy a DVR and tape your late night shows and get more sleep.
Ocean Elf: With that idea I'll never get to watch those shows, my days are taken up with other stuff. I'll just sleep when I can. I might get to bed early one night, sleep in another morning, take an afternoon nap another day, but how I manage my schedule is up to me.
memes2008&2013: When you wake up in the morning
meme2008: complete the following statement, 'My purpose is to __________ today.'
Ocean Elf: Nope. That's not my thing.
meme2013: , Pray to ask God’s guidance for your purpose, today.
Ocean Elf: A better idea IMO than the "My purpose is to" whatever, but still, don't drag God into pay-it-forward/reposting/sharing chain letter schemes!
I know I don't pray on a regular schedule, and probably not as often as I should in the technical sense. But my prayers are just little thoughts that occur randomly, and when I first wake up, I am glad to be alive naturally; but I'm often not alert enough to form much in the way of a real coherent thought/idea as soon as I open my eyes.
meme2008: 5. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
Ocean Elf: Yes, the energy and enthusiasm to write personally typed stuff instead of sending chain letters, the enthusiasm to smash chain letters and the empathy toward people who have been hurt or just annoyed by them…
meme2008: 6. Play more games and read more books than you did in 2007.
Ocean Elf: Or whatever year the last one is… Well, I don't play games because of accessibility issues, and I prefer to do my reading online…
meme2008: 7. Make time to practice meditation, yoga, tai chi, and prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.
Ocean Elf: Yeah, well, I'll take the prayer and leave the rest.
meme2008: 8. Spend time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6.
Ocean Elf: What's it to you how old people are who I spend time with?
meme2008: 9. Dream more while you are awake.
Ocean Elf: Good gosh, you're telling this to one who's probably got daydreaming down to an art.
memes2008&2013: Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
Ocean Elf: *Scowl* Hey food-cop doofus fuzz-head! FYI, all of your hated so-called "manufactured" food originally came from, get this, stuff that grows on plants! And if this is a slam on meat-packing plants or anything not approved for the perfect food-cop and animal rights diet, take your suggestion and put it where the sun don't shine! If you really want my life to stay beautifully awesome, you mind your own mouth and stop telling other people what to eat!My life would get considerably less awesomely beautiful if I had to bow to the dictates of people who tried to make me a vegetarian. And there would be considerably fewer smiles, lack of energy, work would suffer, etc. because I'd be barely eating just to survive. Not so beautiful…
memes2008&2013: Drink green tea
Ocean Elf: I don't drink green tea. I don't drink black tea. I don't like tea unless it's the fruity herbal stuff.
memes2008&2013: and plenty of water..
Ocean Elf: I'll drink as much water as I need, and I will be the one to decide how much I need and when.
memes2008&2013: Eat blueberries,
meme2008: wild Alaskan salmon,
meme2008: & walnuts.
Ocean Elf: I don't like broccoli unless it's in small amounts and blended in soup. I'll eat blueberries and almonds occasionally, but there are people who don't like them or are allergic. Just saying.
Salmon is no problem for me, though again, not everyone likes it… At least you included something not on the food-cop menu. Though I tend to prefer farmed to wild - since the wild salmon I've had tasted a little gamey to me.
memes2008&2013: Try to make at least three people smile each day.
Ocean Elf: Oh, for the ruddy love! You know something, for having just made that suggestion, you have failed miserably to follow through, with me!
Look, I'm not on any sort of smile quota. I'm not going to run around like a phoney, trying to make a certain number of people smile per day. If I make someone, even one person smile or laugh, great, but it will be spontaneous and won't happen every day. Trying to go for three people smiles every day, now if that isn't an extra pressure stresser, I don't know what is.
meme2008: 13. Clear clutter from your house, your car, your desk and let new and flowing energy into your life.
Ocean Elf: What gives you the idea I have a cluttered house, car, and desk? What makes you think clearing it will give me an energy flow?
memes2008&2013: Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
Ocean Elf: Good idea as this is, here's how. Stop with the food&drink tyranny and telling people to walk around smiling and trying to make a smile quota per day, and, zoom! You've just gotten rid of a load of potentially very negative thoughts/moods.
meme2008: 15. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
Ocean Elf: If you had said biology or geometry, then the problems thing would've made more sense. If I learn lessons from problems the same way I tried from algebra, I'm afraid that wouldn't end very well.
memes2008&2013: Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid with a maxed out charge card.
Ocean Elf: how am I supposed to do that on the diet you outlined in the above? Blueberries, almonds and walnuts for breakfast with green tea and water, a big plate of Alascan wild salmon and broccoli salad with a cup of tea and tumbler of water for lunch, and Alascan wild salmon and broccoli with walnuts and almonds with green tea and water for dinner? With the cliche 8 glasses of water a day, and green tea at every meal? That'd sure make the bathroom occupied a great deal. Not to mention get pretty boring day in and out.
meme2008: 17. Smile and laugh more. It will keep the energy vampires away.
Ocean Elf: you're telling this to someone who, believe it or not, is a pretty laughy person, even if some of my meme-smashes don't give that impression.
meme2013: 17. Help the needy, Be generous ! Be a ‘Giver’ not a ‘Taker’
Ocean Elf: Fine, but there are things that won't help the needy, things that are better left not given out. chain letters!
meme2009: Written by Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio
Ocean Elf: Ms. Brett did write the 45 life lessons column, but she is not 90 and she won't be 90 for decades yet.
And here's where the chain letters start ripping off the 45 Life Lessons by Regina Brett.
Regina Brett&meme2009: "To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most-requested column I've ever written.
Ocean Elf: Here's where the meme screws up the facts.
meme2009: My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:
Ocean Elf: Wrong.
Here's what Ms. Brett actually said:
Regina Brett: My odometer rolls over to 50 this week, so here's an update:
Ocean Elf: The article was first posted by Ms. Brett on May 28, 2006 at 10:13 AM, and updated April 03, 2008 at 10:17 AM. Ms. Brett debunks the erroneous statements in the meme email with class and a great sense of humour in this entry, So her birthday is in May, not August, and she had turned 50 in 2006.
Regina Brett: 1.
Regina Brett&memes: Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
Regina Brett: 3.
Regina Brett&memes: Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
Regina Brett: 28.
Regina Brett&memes2008&2013: Forgive them for everything !
Ocean Elf: Both memes Ripped off the same column, the 2013 version stuck both #3 and #28 from that column into one entry to look like they wrote it. Not cool!
Regina Brett: 4.
Regina Brett&memes: Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
meme2008: 21. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
Regina Brett: 6.
Regina Brett and memes: You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
Regina Brett: 11.
Regina Brett&memes: Make peace with your past so it won’t
Regina Brett&meme2009: screw up
Regina Brett&memes: the present.
Regina Brett&meme2009: 8. It's OK to get angry
Regina Brett: with God. He can take it.
Ocean Elf: so whoever decided to make this go viral, saw something the matter with being angry with God, yet was totally cool and dandy with making up a lie about Regina Brett's age. *Scowl* The hypocrisy.
Regina Brett: 35.
Regina Brett&meme2009: Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
Ocean Elf: Ms. Brett's 18th item is:
Regina Brett: 18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.""
Ocean Elf: I completely agree. Don't worry about who reads or comments on what you write, just write. Just don't write chain letters, deliberately.
Regina Brett: 13.
Regina Brett&memes: Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
Regina Brett: 25.
Regina Brett&memes: No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
Regina Brett: 26.
Regina Brett&memes: Frame every so-called disaster with these words: ‘In five years, will this matter?’
Regina Brett&meme2009: 29.
Regina Brett&memes: What other people think of you is none of your business.
Regina Brett&meme2009: 30.
Regina Brett, memes2009&2013: Time
Regina Brett&memes: heals
Regina Brett, memes2008&2009: almost
Regina Brett&memes: everything.
Regina Brett&meme2009: Give time
meme2013: 20. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
Regina Brett: 31
Regina Brett&memes: However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
Regina Brett: 32.
Regina Brett&memes: Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends
meme2009: and parents
Regina Brett&memes: will. Stay in touch.
Regina Brett: 32.Regina Brett: 42:
Regina Brett, memes2008&2009: Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
Ocean Elf: Going to the bathroom usually does the trick. hehe. Sorry, I just couldn't resist…
Ms. Brett's 17th item is:
Regina Brett: "17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today."
Regina Brett: 47.
Regina Brett&meme2009: Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
Ocean Elf: Ms. Brett's real 16 is:
Regina Brett: "16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying."
Regina Brett: 44.
Regina Brett&memes: Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
Regina Brett: 45.
Regina Brett&memes: The best is yet to come.
Regina Brett: 41.
Regina Brett&meme2009: Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
Regina Brett: 46.
Regina Brett&memes: No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
Regina Brett: 43.
Regina Brett&meme2009: All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
Regina Brett: 49.
Regina Brett&meme2009: Yield.
Regina Brett: 50.
Regina Brett&meme2009: Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.
Ocean Elf: Can't disagree with that.
Now what's left is not from Ms. Brett.
meme2008: 35. Do the right thing!
Ocean Elf: Exactly. And that would be:
Instead of passing on chain letters full of quotes from someone without giving them credit, plus quotes from that ever so illustrious author, Anonymous mixed in, how about just bookmarking Regina Brett's original column?
meme2008: 36. Call your family often. (Or email them to death!!!) Hey I'm thinking of ya!
Ocean Elf: Sure, just don't email them chain letters.
memes2008&2013: Each night before you go to bed
meme2008: complete the following statements: I am thankful for __________.
Ocean Elf: A bunch of stuff…
meme2013: ,Pray to God and Be thankful for what you’ll accomplish, today !
Ocean Elf: Don't even! It's fine for Ms Brett to invoke the name of God, it is not for a hoaxer.
Considering "today" is done by "tonight" how can I pray that I will accomplish something I already accomplished in the recent past?
meme2008: Today I accomplished _________.
Ocean Elf: Another meme-smash.
memes2008&2013: Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.
Ocean Elf: Good golly, can someone please pass me a bucket? This cheesy drip is making me a bit sick.
Look, your whole plan, minus all the stuff you ripped off Regina Brett's column, would be enough to make a person feel more stressed than blessed.
It would surely suck walking around with a phoney smile, trying to rack up three people you're supposed to make smile every day, living on broccoli, blueberries, almonds, salads, green tea, and water.
meme2008: 39. Enjoy the ride. Remember this is not Disney World and you certainly don't want a fast pass.
Ocean Elf: not disney World, eh? Try telling that to my Disney princess friend. What's that got to do with fast passes preventing you from enjoying the ride of life anyway?
meme2008: You only have one ride through life so make the most of it and enjoy the ride.
Ocean Elf: Didn't we already ride off this cliff?
meme2008: 40. Please Forward this to everyone you care about.
meme2013: 25.Share this to everyone on your list to help them lead a happier life…!!!!
Ocean Elf: Ack! Not on your life! Not on my life! No thanks, no how!I just knew that would be coming!
No forwarding/sharing/liking from me! Nobody needs chain letters that rip off stuff from people's writings and stick in a bunch of other annoyingly cheesy ideas for leading a supposedly better happier life… My life always gets a little less happy when I see people repost/share/forward this kruft.
meme2008: May your troubles be less,
Ocean Elf: Cut out the virals and that's one less trouble.
meme2008: May your blessings be more,
Ocean Elf: Every personally written comment or status/post that is not some LMS/sharing chain letter or bad news or flame/troll/spam, is a blessing.
meme2008: May nothing but happiness come through your door!
Ocean Elf: sorry, but that is impossible. Much as I wish it, there isn't going to be only happiness in my life, whether it "comes through the door" as you put it or not.
memes: Its estimated 93% of people won't forward this.
Ocean Elf: *Facepalm* Oh, the coercive idiocy!
First of all, how can you even be sure every single person on earth has received one of the mutations of this viral, or even the real Ms. Brett column in full and in order?
wouldn't it be nice if only it was true that 93% of netizens wouldn't forward chain letters?!
Unfortunately, the percentage of forwarders/re-shares is likely to remain high, because there are always newbies who haven't learned about meme fwds, plus people who know about it, but don't care a wit that it's really junk, choosing to remain in the constant state of self-delusion that they're somehow doing the world this very great great service and that they'll get brownie points and be thought of as absolutely great simply by spamming the net with this bilge.
memes: If you are one of the 7% who will, forward this with the title '7%'.
Ocean Elf: No, and, NO!
memes: I'm in the 7%
Ocean Elf: Well bully for you. if anything, the percentage of reposts needs to drop to nil.
memes: Remember that I will always share my spoon with you!
Ocean Elf: Eww! Blech! Hoaxer germs! No thanks! Get your own spoon, I'll get my own too.