10 Stupid Questions And Answers
This list of stupid questions and answers was posted on this blog back on December 9, 2009.
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Meme: 10 most Stupid Questions and Funny Answers
Ocean Elf: Oh, yay, I probably won't laugh.
Meme: Here are the 10 most stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations…
Ocean Elf: Starting with "Isn't this hilarious?"
Meme: Many of you might have already experienced few of these situations. Next time someone asks you these questions, you can answer them as given below:
Ocean Elf: Probably…Not…
Meme: 1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/ friends…
Ocean Elf: People ask questions at the movies?
Meme: *Stupid Question:* Hey, what are you doing here?
Ocean Elf: This isn't meant to be taken literally, therefore, is not exactly a stupid question. It's more of an astonished expression at seeing someone familiar at the same place, same time as you without planning it.
Meme: *Funny Answer:* Don’t u know, I sell tickets in black over here.
Ocean Elf: Okay, if that exchange ever happens, I'll be able to tell that the answerer takes advice from chain letters.
Meme: 2. In the bus:
Ocean Elf: 'On' not 'in' the bus.
Meme: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet…
Ocean Elf: She doesn't have to be called 'heavy' even a slight-framed person stepping on your foot in high heels will hurt like heck. Anyone near your size stepping on your foot with their full weight will hurt like heck. But yeah, the high heels would be even worse.
Meme: *Stupid Question:* Sorry, did that hurt?
Ocean Elf:Okay, I can't deny that would be a stupid question. Which is why I'd just stick with "sorry" and leave it at that.
Meme: *Funny Answer:* No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia. Why don’t you try again?
Ocean Elf: Not only is that a stupid answer, it's just passive-aggressive snark that makes you a jerk. No grins from me.
Meme: 3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask…
Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes* Oh, seriously? Have you no boundaries?
Meme: *Stupid Question:* Why, why him, of all people.
Ocean Elf: Perfectly good question if the person who died was a kind, decent individual, or an innocent child, when there are evil sadistic people still living who would benefit society by kicking the bucket, you insensitive moron!
Meme: *Funny Answer:* Why? Would it rather have been you?
Ocean Elf: No, I'd rather it was you. Well did you find that funny? Hah, then don't try that on some grieving person, you idiot! *Scowl*
Meme: 4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Ocean Elf: about some item on the menu, it's not a stupid question.
Meme: *Stupid Question:* Is ! the "Butter Paneer Masala" dish good?
Ocean Elf: No, I wouldn't ask that, because this dish is something I probably wouldn't pronounce correctly, and doesn't look like something I'd order in the first place.
Meme: *Funny Answer:* No, its terrible and made of adulterated stuff. We occassionaly also spit in it.
Ocean Elf: Even in kidding, he could get sacked for answers like that. Way to go, getting fired for trying out bad suggestions from a chain letter.
Meme: 5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years…
Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes* Because everybody knows aunts and uncles say and do dumb things. Oh please!
Meme: *Stupid Question:* Munna, Chickoo, you’ve become so big.
Ocean Elf: Gah That's only something said to little kids who are still growing, and want to grow up big and tall and strong like the adults around them.
Meme: *Funny Answer:* Well, you haven’t particularly shrunk yourself.
Ocean Elf: *Scowl* Stupid appearance-obsessed food-cop. *Rolling eyes* Even a kid who said that would get a good shake and tongue-lashing from me for that if I was in charge of them. It's tactless, shallow and stupid coming from an adult, and bratty and rude coming from a kid.
Meme: 6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask…
Ocean Elf: I wouldn't ask, I'd give her congratulations.
Meme: *Stupid Question:* Is the guy you’re marrying good?
Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes* Oh, seriously!? Who in the world really asks that?
Meme: *Funny Answer:* No,he’s a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout… It’s just the money.
Ocean Elf: Wow, so funny I forgot to laugh. Another stupid answer that's over-done on sarcasm and empty on wit or anything that's actually funny.
Meme: 7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call…
Ocean Elf: Ugh. 'awakened' not 'woken up'.
Meme: *Stupid Question:* Sorry, were you sleeping?
Ocean Elf: Only a dunce would ask that. Anyone making a legitimate call at that hour would say "Sorry to get you out of bed, but" and then go on with an explanation of whatever the urgent news or emergency is.
Meme: *Funny Answer:* No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping? You dumb witted moron.
Ocean Elf: *Pfft* Again, you went way too far trying to be witty and funny and you failed.
The answer I like to give with nuisance calls is "That's okay, I had to get up and get the phone anyway."
Meme: 8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair…
Ocean Elf: *Sigh* Usually people just make comments "Nice haircut" that sort of thing.
Meme: *Stupid Question:* Hey have you had a haircut?
Ocean Elf: They say this because they haven't seen the person in a while, and/or just want to be sure their eyes aren't wonking out before saying "Nice haircut" only to be told "I didn't get a haircut".
Meme: *Funny Answer:* No, its autumn and I’m shedding….
Ocean Elf: Gah, stupid answer. People shed year round, and they don't shed the ends off their hair, they shed full strands… Duh! Attempt at funny and wit, fail!
Meme: 9. At the dentist when he’s sticking pointed objects in your mouth…
Ocean Elf: He tells me beforehand what's being done, what to expect, and how well I'm doing…
Meme: *Stupid Question:* Tell me if it hurts?
Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes* That's definitely not a stupid question. He has to know if there are any problem areas in the teeth and if there is pain, where it is, and what to do about it.
Meme: *Funny Answer:* No it won’t. It will just bleed.
Ocean Elf: Actually that's true when the freezing kicks in… But I don't say much of anything. You can't talk when someone's working with stuff in your mouth. So grunts, hand signals, knee jerks, that's pretty much all you can do then.
Meme: 10. You are smoking a cigarette
Ocean Elf: I don't smoke. Yuck!
Meme: and a cute woman asks…
Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes* I don't think of women that way. And because she's a "cute woman" you think that must also mean "stupid" *scowl* Take a hike!
Meme: *Stupid Question:* Oh, so you smoke.
Ocean Elf: That's not a stupid question, you mook, it's an observation!
Meme: *Funny Answer:* Gosh, it’s a miracle. It was a piece of chalk and now it’s in flames!!!
Ocean Elf: Instead of being witty and funny, you really come off looking like an idiot full of hot air! Great job!
Over and out.